My thought is that your girl should just thank her friends for the gifts. I think it's nice to reciprocate on occasion, but I wouldn't teach her that she has to give a gift because she received a gift. As far as tv, I think that you might develop another game plan for the kids to do during small group. They need to have something to do/occupy themselves that's productive and/or fun. Even if you brought a dvd? Maybe you all could switch off and have group night at other homes, too? That way you could sort of show the other parents ways to entertain the kids other than tv.